Rihokora #47 - May 28, 2022 - Meeting face to face

 Gratitude and the importance of being able to meet

Hello everyone.  Long time no see.

I will be holding a live tour this winter, and I am currently visiting the tour venues to meet the fans in advance.  So far I have been to Hiroshima, Osaka, Nagoya, and Fukuoka.  This was the first time since I returned to work that I did events like these in many cities, and I was able to meet many people for the first time since coming back.  It felt like a miracle.

We had so much to say.  There were people who told me they hadn't seen me in 7 years.  There were others who told me they were in elementary school, junior high, or high school when I was active in the past, and they couldn't meet me at the time.  There were also many children.  And people who only learned about me recently.  Amazing, isn't it?

Everyone was there for different reasons, but regardless of the reason, I was full of gratitude.  Meeting so many people was really a miracle.

I am having events in Tokyo and Sendai, beginning tomorrow, so please come and see me if you like.

By the way, in my last column at the beginning of May, I said that the column would be updated on the 28th of next month.  Based on that statement, the next update should have been on June 28.  However, I had written the article in April (without knowing it would have been posted in May), so... I am updating it today, May 28.

So you must be wondering, why am I not updating it in June?  You probably don't know me at all if you are asking that.  Because today is my 24th birthday.

Starting my 24th year with everyone!

Today we have a fan meeting where we will have the chance to play and deliver a, different than usual, live performance.  It might be my birthday, but I want everyone to enjoy the show.  I have given this event a lot of thought, worked hard rehearsing, and preparing.  Now that I am writing this, I am nervous, hoping it will be a good event.

It's been a while since I felt this way.  In previous years, nothing really happened on my birthday, and I wouldn't realize what day it was, until my birthday arrived, so now that I am having a big celebration, I can't help but be nervous.  Even talking about it here is making me nervous.  Today's event will have an audience.  So lately, when I return home after finishing my daily schedule, I feel anxious and have a hard time falling asleep lol

Today will be a good chance to digest everything that has been piling up.  I wonder what kind of day, and year it will be.

Here's a picture from after one of the events, where I'm drunk with happiness lol

https://wanibooks-newscrunch.com/articles/-/3193

Rihokora #46 - May 6, 2022 - Don't feel down

 The first update in a few weeks!

Long time, no see.  How have you been lately.  Is everyone doing well?

I am not so busy at the moment, and I have time to sit back, think, and absorb things.  However, even though I am not busy with work, I still have a lot of stuff to do.

Today, as I am writing this column, the weather is very nice, and I am writing on the terrace for the first time in a while.  I feel better, especially since I got a haircut recently.

When it's cold, we only really go out when we have to, right?  I feel that my QOL (quality of life) has improved, simply by having the desire to spend time outside.  (I really wanted to use the word QOL).

Ah... Speaking of QOL, I recently replaced my bike with an electric one.  It was warmer the other day, and I thought I should go for a ride, and as I was cycling, I passed by a bike shop.

I was looking at the bikes in the shop, and the clerk said "You're interested in electric bikes, right?", and went on to explain how different types of bikes compare to each other, and the trade-in evaluation of my current bike.  It was a difficult decision to make, but the kindness of the clerk convinced me to buy the bike there.  It was probably just the way they do business, but it's fine.

Now I can ride my bike to many places.  It's fun, and easy to go far now.  It makes me happy that I now look forward to commuting by bike.  My QOL has really improved.

Self experimentation

Now, let's change the subject.  What kind of person do you see me as?  I honestly don't know how people see me, but I think I am a person whose mood and personality changes easily, depending on the time of year, or even the day, or time of day.  And that's something I don't like.

For example, sometimes when I am talking to "high tension" people, I feel embarrassed.  Or I suddenly become shy with people I used to feel comfortable being frank with, which surprises me.

I often felt I was in the gray zone of my mood level.  And I feel I have been able to exit this gray zone the last few weeks.  The reason is because I have been experimenting lately, trying to prioritize my own feelings when interacting with people.

I know, it sounds like I am being selfish, but... when someone would ask me "What do you want to do?", my answer would be "I don't know", because I was thinking "What would be the most convenient answer for the other person?"

I think it's because I am afraid of being hurt if people don't like me, but I do this so much, that I don't even know what I want myself anymore.

Now, I am trying to say "no" when I mean "no" and "yes" when I mean "yes".  I wasn't used to this type of thinking and behavior, and it made me feel uncomfortable for a while.

I was wondering if this is really the right behavior, but after some time, I have finally gotten used to it.

Just before I turn 24... time for change

It's a bit hard to explain, but I tend to avoid challenges that I can sense will get me in trouble.  But from now on, I will try to act in a way that is more in line with my feelings.  So that I can try more things perhaps.  Does it make sense?  I hope you can understand.

As an adult, I realize the importance of self-care, and I think I should focus more on my life, so that I can live better with the people around me.  Having said that, I worry that those who read this may begin to dislike me.

Well, this was the first column in a long time, but beginning next month, I will be updating on the 28th every month.  The bi-weekly updates will become monthly updates.  Although the updates will be less frequent, they will definitely include more content.  So I hope you will continue to look forward to them.  Thank you.

Finally, I would like to end with a picture that made me realize what a big city Tokyo really is.

It's something you forget sometimes when you live here.  See you next time!

https://wanibooks-newscrunch.com/articles/-/3127