Rihokora #21 - Apr 17, 2021 - It's not too hard, if you think about it

 Bad habits?  Be aware of them and they will change

In Tokyo, the cherry blossoms from the sakura trees have already fallen, and they have become trees with beautiful leaves.  In my neighborhood, there is a place where you can often see sakura trees, and recently, I have been enjoying taking walks during the day, and looking forward to seeing the flowerless sakura trees.

Just recently I discovered something.  I am always rushing myself.

I was talking about my life to a person at work recently.  "Well, first, before I entered the entertainment industry, I, eh... took dance lessons" "Ah, I asked my parents to let me take lessons.  And well..." I explained, and the response was "I am being patient, so please explain everything in order.  Why are you in such a hurry?"

Surprised, I thought "wow, that's true!  Why am I being impatient if no one is rushing me?"

I was then told "Can you calm down and explain it to me again?", at which point, I took a deep breath, organized my thoughts, and I was able to explain everything in a better way than when I was in a hurry.  That wasn't difficult at all, I thought!  I was able to calm down, simply by being aware of the need to do so.  Or rather, it is more so that I realized I don't have to feel that unpleasant anxiety I have when I am impatient.

Sometimes, when I am impatient, words come out of my mouth without thinking, which makes me even more impatient, and I fall into a negative cycle.  Is it because I am trying to avoid silence?

I was wondering if anyone else felt the same way. 

Finding the right words to convey what you mean

I am quite careful with my words when I am writing, whether it is for my column or on instagram.  "Am I using words that express my feelings accurately?  Are my words hurtful to others?" (this is what I keep in mind when I write, and I sometimes have to go back and edit my column lol)

The more tasks I have, the more and more careful I become, to the point where my head begins to hurt.  That's when the alert goes off.

However, during a recent meeting with my managers, I received a better response when I explained in words the project I had in mind, rather than when I showed them the written materials I had prepared.  Expressing it in words was better I guess.

I discovered that, even though the feelings are the same, the way they are conveyed differs, depending on what words are used to express them, and that the amount of time we spend preparing our words, doesn't always matter.  In the future, I will try to be calm, and have more confidence in my own words.

About this photo:  I recently tried gel nails for the first time.  The design was kawaii, but the gel rounded off the tips of my nails, I wasn't able to easily pop them off when they were itchy, and I couldn't properly play guitar, which I have been practicing lately.  So I went back to my own nails.  I have been doing my own nail polish for years, so I am confident I can do it neatly.  I'm in the mood for navy blue this week!

https://wanibooks-newscrunch.com/articles/-/1885